A Monster Ate My Sandwich

  "Tell me a scary story , Ricky ," Timmy said.

    "I'm not telling you a story. Go to sleep."

  "I don't want to go to sleep. I want a story."
    "I said no. Now shut up and go to sleep."
  "I will if you tell me a story."

    "Yeah , right. How many times have I heard that? A million times. Now shut the fuck up and go... to... sleep!"

  "If I don't get a story , I'll wake up Dad and tell him you said the f word."

  "You better not you little freak ," Ricky said ,"or I'll pound you!"

  "Then tell me a story!" Timmy pulled back his covers and made like he was getting out of bed. "Make up your mind. Story , or tell Dad you said the f word?"

  "Alright , you little freak! I'll tell you a story , then you better go to sleep , or I really will pound you!"
  "I will. I promise."

  Ricky sighed wearily and turned over onto his back. If he didn't tell him a story , the little brat would have him up all night. Staring up at the ceiling , he said ,"This is a story about an annoying little booger boy who believed in ghosts and monsters. In the middle of the night the booger went downstairs for a midnight snack , and a monster came out of the closet and ate his sandwich. And then it ate him. The end. Now go to sleep."

  "Hey! That's not a story! I want a real story!"
  "It's the only one you're getting. Now shut up , or so help me God , I'll pound you!
  "I can't go to sleep yet!"
  "Why not?"

  "You have to look under my bed and make sure a monster's not hiding there."

  "I'm not looking under your bed!"
  "I guess I'll have to tell Dad what you said , then."

  "Alright!" Ricky got down on hands and knees and looked under Timmy's bed. Even though it was too dark to see anything , he was sure there were no monsters hiding under it.

  "See anything?"

  "No , there's no mon ~" Ricky's eyes suddenly widened , and he was pulled under the bed. "Help me , Timmy! Somethings got me!"

  Whimpering in fright , Timmy pulled the covers over his head , not daring to look , lest the monster get him , too.

  After a moment of silence , Timmy said ,"Ricky? Please don't be dead!" When he finally peeked out from under the covers , Ricky jumped up from the side of the bed , laughing.

 "That wasn't funny , Ricky!"
  "Yes it was. And you had it coming. Now go to sleep."
  "No! Not until you look in the closet!"
  "You said if I looked under the bed you would go to sleep. You promised."
  "Oh , Daaaa ~ aaad!"
  "Alright , you little snot , but this better be it!"
  Ricky approached the closet and placed a hand on the door knob. Timmy said ,"Do you believe in monsters , Ricky?"
  "Of course not."
  "Why not?"
 "Only babies believe in monsters."
  "But they eat you if you don't believe in them."
  "Who told you that? One of your baby friends?"

  Ricky grasped the door knob ... and yanked it open , revealing nothing but darkness inside. Timmy thought that he might pull another stunt , but Ricky turned and said ,"Are  you fucking satisfied now?"
  Timmy's eyes widened , and he let out a scream , pulling  the covers over his head : a large , unusually hairy and gnarled hand  had shot out of the darkness , grabbed Ricky by the back of the neck , and pulled him into the closet.

  He had no time to scream.

  The closet door slowly began to shut.

  From within the darkness , there were horrible crunching sounds , and a deep , guttural voice said , "Soooo goooood."

  A small pool of blood appeared from under the door.

  "They eat you if you don't believe in them ," Timmy said , and laid down to go to sleep.